The hardest man in wigan

Well, what a flipping week.

My dad fell on Monday morning. He was found with his leg behind his back, femur fractured in three !!! Ouch we softies may say! But I got to hospital and he didn't know what was wrong.

Is it hurting I asked?  What was the reply?? I then spent the next seven hours on a three minute loop


Him: Where am I ?
Me:Hospital
Him:why?
Me: you have fallen
Him:when?
Me:this morning , you broke your leg?
Him : who told you that?
Me: the doctor !!

Me: does it hurt?
Him:What



And repeat......for three days


I have tried to explain to staff he has advanced dementia, they acknowledge but don't at the same time. The nursing has been fantastic. But they don't get advanced dementia.


30 second Memory seems an alien concept. Leaving him with a urine bottle and saying press the buzzer when you have finished does not work. By the time they have finished explaining he has forgotten and thinks it is something he needs to fix.  So he re shapes the bottle, and wonders what the remote control is doing in his hand when there is no TV?

Even my mum does not get it, she actually witnessed him asking where he was three times before saying , remember when I was in hospital last year.

Makes me want to scream, he can't remember his last breath let alone what you last told him.

Tomorrow they are mobilising him. That will be interesting. Needless to say I will be briefing staff first thing about immediacy of information and action.

I have to say even the paramedic came back as he could not understand such a break and no pain, that's advanced dementia sunshine, and no matter how much you think you understand, it evades explanation.,

I despair! A phrase I use a lot these days.

Dementia is horrid and cruel' but please try to understand and train health care professionals as this will get worse.